Did anyone else have such a hard time with bedtime?
6:45 Maddie gets a bath. Nice and clean, I brush her hair and put her into a clean onesie.
7:00 I'm rocking Maddie to sleep in my arms. She likes to sleep upright with her head on my shoulder. If she's reclining, she wants a binky and a binky distracts her from sleeping. When she's upright, she falls asleep without one. I rocked her for 20 minutes while Angie watched a bedtime show.
7:30 Maddie is in her cradle, sound asleep. I head downstairs to run the bath for Angie. We get her hair washed and conditioned and then Maddie starts to wake up. She's only making a little noise, though, so I hope she'll go back to sleep while I hurriedly get Angie soaped and rinsed. By then, Maddie is ready to cry full out, so I scoop Angie out of the tub, wrap her in a towel and send her to sit in the living room while I get Maddie.
7:45 Maddie is crying in her baby chair while I dry Angie and get her into her pajamas and comb her hair. I scoop Maddie up and walk her around trying to calm her while she screams and Angie begs for a pre-bedtime drink.
7:55 Finally, Maddie is quiet and drifting off again. I usher Angie upstairs for a quick story. She perches on the edge of my knees while I cradle Maddie and attempt to hold and read a book.
8:05 Angie is in bed. I put Maddie in the cradle, but she wakes almost immediately. The front door opens and Miguel comes in from dropping Irisvette off at home. I deposit Maddie in his arms and shuffle off to fold the whites.
9:00 Maddie is in her cradle, hopefully asleep for the night.
Fortunately, Miguel is here most nights and I don't have to worry about a screaming baby and a tired toddler. But how do you get that baby into your routine? How do you make it work so that tired babies don't throw a monkey wrench into the whole thing? How do you make the toddler understand that she can't have her story tonight because the baby is screaming? How do you get her to understand that you can't just put the baby down any old time and attend to the toddler's needs?
I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed and emotional right now, and a bit of comforting advice would be well received!
2 comments:
Firstly, she's still very little. The first six to eight weeks are definitely the hardest! Try keeping track of when she is awake and how long. She probably has about two periods each day when she is awake for longer amounts of time, usually just gazing quietly at the world around her. And she probably has at least two periods of extended, uninterrupted sleep, usually right after the extended wakings. The trick is to try to get her to sleep when you want her to. Easier said than done!
One of the things you can do, though, is start by extending her waking period by about fifteen minutes. She'll be fussy because she wants to sleep, but try to keep her awake just a little longer. With repeated effort like this, you can gently adjust her schedule to be more in line with yours.
Another thing that will help is keeping a routine. When you know she is ready to settle for one of her longer naps, sit down in a quiet room with soft light, sing her favorite lullaby and nurse her to sleep. After a while, this will become a sleep cue and she'll settle quicker and sleep longer following this little routine.
Make sure, though, that Angie isn't bothering you while you do this. Set her up with some quiet activity first and tell her you'll be back in a few minutes. Babies are a great way for older siblings to learn selflessness. She'll learn to be quiet while the baby is napping and to wait until you're done to hear her story and she'll be a better person for learning to yield her own desires to the needs of another.
But above all, remember that Maddie is still so young! It takes time for everyone to settle into the new baby routine, even the new baby. It will get better as time goes on.
Lots of love,
Jennie
Do you have a wrap or a sling for babywearing? It would allow you to carry the baby around hands free during fussy times, and still be atleast mostly available to get the toddler all situated with whatever she needs. Babywearing is not only wonderful for what it is in and of itself, but also be a big life safer when you have more than one child.
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